Life changes

So I’m frustrated and I just don’t know where to start. I’m overwhelmed and with no answers, it is scary.

It’s scary not knowing what my daughter can or can’t eat. Or if she will go into anaphylactic shock for eating something she shouldn’t.

I think The biggest thing is the unknown. Everything is just so new and only 2 doctors are really studying what she has, so it is scary.

One minute she was enjoying hotdogs & hamburgers the next we found out they were making her sick. So that’s another I struggle I deal with. I was feeding my child something that was hurting her, without even knowing.

How can something so tiny cause that much trouble? Some say the government trials, others say it’s been around but no one knew about it. All I know is it is now a part of my family’s life. We have to make life changes which can be very trying!

Sometimes we have to cook two different meals, while others we try new things. I have to not only watch but teach her what to watch for. We have to make sure she doesn’t feel left out and provide education to her school, friends, and other family.

This is a life altering & can be life threatening diagnosis. There is currently no cure and it can get worse over time. So all I can do is learn as much as possible, ask lots of questions, and most of all, provide support for her.

Life changes, we just have to gain more knowledge and move on.

Living with a Child with Red meat allergy

Went to the doctor yesterday and he said she goes back in 3 months. Praying the test is negative as he said it has to be negative 2x before he would let her chance eating any red meat. So if that one is negative she will go back in 3 more months for another test. As you can have false positives.

So she still can’t have any “hairy mammal” meat. He said that sometimes people can go into remission but it is still too new to determine too many details on whether they can safely eat meat. But there are now studies on alpha-gal. So hopefully there will be better answers soon.

She has to be careful about some foods you wouldn’t think have meat byproducts including some medications. But he said Claritin as well as the equate version of liquid Benadryl is okay for her to use.

So a lot of new things. Her tests also confirms her allergy to milk, which we already knew about.

It is hard to change your whole lifestyle, so quick, from one thing that happened. It can be life threatening but so far it’s not. Hopefully we can keep it that way.

So for now we just keep on praying and have faith for healing!

Alpha-Gal Syndrome

So what exactly is alpha gal allergy. It is an allergy that has been recently discovered that prevents people from eating red meat because an allergic reaction. They are still researching but it has been found to be caused by lone star ticks and chiggers.

So my daughter was diagnosed from a blood test with this allergy test last June 2019.

At first I was shocked but I wasn’t upset because I have faith that everything is going to work out. Yes I want to cry but I was at work so I sucked it up. I couldn’t cry at home because my husband was gone to an archery tournament and I was the only one caring for the kids. I didn’t want her to worry.

It is hard to have to tell your kid she can’t do something, especially when she loves something. When I sat her down she thought I was joking. She just turned 11 and she loves Spaghetti and meatballs, ribs and jerky. She can no longer eat “hairy meats” My daughter was upset but handled it well, and first thing that came to mind for her was no jerky. She handled it better than most adults would and she completely understood what was going on.

There is a chance this can be temporary as long as she doesn’t get bit again.

I have complete faith that God will heal her and this is only temporary. As a little background, she went to running camp and got ate up by chiggers and had a bad blood infection. She was sick for a couple weeks and every since then every so often she gets this rash that looks like a bruise. It was not very frequent so I never put it together that it would be an allergy. She also had stomachaches, headaches, and some minor rashes that looked like dry skin. It never was right after she ate, so when they said that I was shocked.

Now I am a firm believer that the people who are the least educated are the ones who worry the most. Man was I right on that! I started studying and asking and joined some groups to learn more.

But the problem is it is so new that there is not a lot of information. The CDC doesn’t even recognize it as a tick borne illness at this time.

There are some that have this that go into anaphylactic shock, which I am glad she has not. I still don’t believe it, I guess, but I think that just because she will be fine. There is not a cure, but we have a God I give all of our fears and our problems too. I know he is going to get us through.

Although I am still scared it’s not going to go away & she’s going to have a lot of changes. If it gets worse she’s going to have to carry an EpiPen. For only an 11 year old that is a lot but I know there are other kids out there dealing with so much worse. It’s just a rough road, but I know that our God is strong enough to take care of whatever we need. We will know more in a few weeks and I will update as needed but I’ve never thought it would be my child but I’m grateful and a little relieved that we are finally getting answers.

It is a start and I pray God will watch over us. No ma’am what we face there is always a silver lining. We just have to look a little harder at times.

Until more answers, we will pray, and enjoy life. We find a way to move on.

Such a Time as This

This a tribute to an amazing person who is now in heaven rejoicing and singing praises. We lost a truly amazing person May 3, 2019. She was a warrior, child of Christ, mother, fighter, and so much more!

She was the kind of person that Even though she went through a major fight with cancer and the devil; she never complained. She always had a beautiful smile on her face and put others first. She always took the time to help others in need.

There were times when quitting seemed easier with some of the things I went through but she inspired me, along with many others, to be a better person & always keep going. She had a heart of gold. I just can not say enough good about her.

I struggled a few times and she always knew what to say. Some of her key phrases I remember her telling me is:

Winning: If you are out there trying you may not win the gold buckle but you will be winning. Never giving up will pay off if you keep trying. Winning is not letting the devil take your faith away! Winning is overcoming fear and conquering your demons. Winning is the baby steps you take on your way to greatness.

I was struggling with things after my wreck and not riding horses yet; and at the time she wasn’t riding horses either. She sent me this message and it gave me hope. She never waivered in her faith and was truly inspirational!

The last thing I got was a text from her, as even in her toughest times she still sent out a positive texts on Fridays.

“If you don’t value yourself, don’t expect anyone else to value you. Be the best you God intended you to be and not who the devil hoped you were.” Rpotter

She loved helping others and loved showing what Faith can do. I know many people said at her celebration of life, how she didn’t want anyone to know how sick she truly was. She did it because she didn’t want anyone to lose faith.

I was struggling with sleep and kept having nightmares for almost a month. Then one night, I had a dream with her in it. I sent this to her the next day but never got to tell her the details of the Dream.

“I had a dream about you last night. It was strange. You were at my house and we were talking about life and God. It was actually a very peaceful dream. Which I haven’t been having lately. I really can’t describe it. ”

See in this dream it felt so real, like she was right there. We talked about our kids, husbands, and everything else good going on with our lives. We talked about how God puts people in our lives for certain times, just like Esther. We talked how he protects us and in the end we will be surrounded by a peaceful fog with a huge glorious light shining through from above and we would be lifted up by the hand of God to the golden gates of Heaven.

This dream brought me so much peace and not even sure how it came about.

I will never be able to thank her enough or her family enough for supporting her while she followed Gods dreams for her. She was an amazing person and I just hope I’m at least 1/2 that good of a person. I’ll miss her Sunday morning services before barrel racing, her mentorship, her positive texts, her unbelievable prayers, her faith, her compassion, and most of all her heart. She absolutely loved her family and was so proud of them. Never once did I hear her say anything negative. She will truly be missed but I know I will see her again.

So in honor of her, think positive, be positive, show others positivity; but most of all HAVE FAITH and NEVER GIVE UP! Your problems are all in God’s hands so give it to him and focus on what God wants you to do with your life. As Roxy would say the battle was already won, you just focus on God and doing the right thing and let God handle your problems. Because YOU, YES You, were made for such a time as this!

Last New Year Resolutions-Goals- Accomplished?

I had so much going on last year that I didn’t have time to process much. Between work, kids, and recovering, it really didn’t give me a chance.

Everyone in my family wrote on a piece of paper a goal for the year. The bigger the goal the better. My goal last year was simple, to get stronger so I can ride horses again.

Now I did get to ride a couple times last year for a short time. But the fear of the what if’s took over. Which is crazy as I didn’t get hurt on a horse. I got hurt in a truck. Crazy I know! I seen what it did to my husband and kids when I was not able to take care of myself, and I didn’t want it to happen again. So I became cautious.

With that means putting what I love in a drawer and locking it away. Not really on purpose but I just had something telling me not yet.

Maybe it was me listening to the doctor when he said he didn’t recommend me riding but if I did to wait at least a year. Maybe it was me fearing of what I would accomplish. Maybe it was a fear of what if I am unable to do what I love without hurting myself again.

So many things, yet my life was so hectic I never figured it out last year. During the New Year I did have a chance to reflect.

I know God was telling me not yet for a reason. I trust that he knows best and I should always follow when he tells me to do, or not to do something!

I realize that I am not afraid of horses or riding, I’m afraid getting on the horse and not being able to keep riding. Not of getting hurt, but me not being able to physically ride.

Yes I know it is a crazy thing to be scared of. I should be just thankful I am here, and I know I am blessed. Like everyone else, I have emotions too, and I’m human as well.

We put thoughts in our heads that sometimes keep us out of trouble, but sometimes they keep us from accomplishing great things.

I believe we are all here for a purpose and I know life is too short. So instead of all the what if’s, I am taking the next step.

The next step is actually getting back on a horse, not just for a few minutes. Then continuously riding all year. This is the only way I will know if I can do it still.

I still have back and hip pain, and never got my back fixed. So not 100% sure if my body will handle me riding like I used to. But if I don’t at least try, then I will be giving into what the devil wants. I will be giving into my fears, and for that I need to try!

Four wheeling-Get out of life’s ruts!

We have the power to control our lives as God gave us the power to choose. He also gave us the tools to become greater than we are today! Many of us, don’t ever reach our destiny as we stay in the same ruts.

Just like four wheeling, if you keep driving down the same ruts, they will just keep getting deeper. If we keep going down the same path, it only gets harder to get out.

Now I’m not saying it is impossible, as with God anything is possible. But it is easier at times to stay in those ruts as we already know what to expect.

Now imagine going down those ruts, and you start climbing up, just to slide back down. To some it’s scary as they feel like anytime they start getting somewhere, something happens and they slide back down. At that point you have a choice.

One of your choices are to stay in that rut and give up trying. This will lead to despair, regret, anger, and depression. Many people feel they are too weak to go on, or it’s pointless. I’ve been down this road a few times, and it is easy to get sucked back down. I had one person tell me once, if you think you are beaten, then you are. Part of overcoming obstacles is our outlook. Which leads to the other choice and that is to try again!

If you keep struggling and not getting the outcome you want, STOP! Take a step back, and think of what you truly want. The people who are experienced at four wheeling, usually know what to do in situations. Do you know why that is?

They have experienced it, or have learned from someone else who has. They know how to get out of those ruts that suck you down. They don’t go in the mud hole thinking they will fail. They go in with confidence that they will prevail!

For any trial we go through, we should do the same. Face it knowing that we have an amazing God who has the power to perform miracles! I always say this and will say it again: For one negative, think of at least 3 positives.

It’s hard at first, but I promise it makes a difference. I was in a few ruts and didn’t know how to get out. I thought I was stuck and no matter what I couldn’t get out. Then I got stronger, spiritually and mentally. I overcame those obstacles.

I won’t lie and say it’s easy now, as you will always have battles you are faced with. If you seek God, the devil will try to put you in deep ruts, sometimes some that you don’t think is possible to get out of! That is just life unfortunately. What you can control is how you respond to these obstacles.

God has gave us the tools we need to become greater. He’s given us the power to overcome as well as free will to choose. It is on us to figure out if we are going to choose the path meant for us or the path that leads to nowhere. For if we choose God, the end of our road leads to glory, to me that is worth all the struggles!

Christmas The Ultimate Present

Most think of Christmas as the time for gifts, feasts, and seeing family they haven’t seen in awhile. Yeah most understand it’s Jesus’s birthday, but don’t honestly know the true meaning. We get stuck a lot on trying to buy the ultimate present. But honestly the best presents in life are not bought!

The best presents I have ever had were ones my kids handmade me. Those gifts were made with Love, you can’t put a price tag on that. Those are the priceless gifts. If I had to rank gifts they would be at the top with only one other surpassing them.

See God knew before Jesus was even born his plans. He knew that his only son would be born in order to save all of us. How can we top that? Jesus Christ was born with a purpose, just like us. God gave us the ultimate present when he gave us his son, Jesus Christ.

Who else could give us the gift of eternal life? All the gifts in the world combined just can’t add up to what God gave us. I don’t even know what we could possibly do to pay him back.

So this Christmas and each Christmas in the future I challenge everybody to remember the true meaning. Like someone told me we will have good Christmas’s and not as good Christmas’s. But the true gifts are the blessings in our lives.

So if you are at a point to be a blessing to others, do so, because you never know when you’ll need a blessing yourself.

Remember blessings do not have to be huge, as the little things are the ones we tend to not forget. Even if it is just being nice to someone, that may mean more than you know.

Merry Christmas!