Don’t take things for granted

Never take anything for granted! No minute of the day is ever promised. So when you are struggling, remember someone else is wishing they could be in your position.

For those who go to a race and don’t clock to get a check, tip over barrels, still stuck in the 5D, be grateful. There is someone out there that would love the opportunity to be doing what you are doing. They would love to be able to go down that alley or even just ride a horse.

Sometimes our life changes, and so must our plans. Just because you are blessed to do something one day, doesn’t mean you can tomorrow. It doesn’t mean give up, you just have to adjust to your new normal.

This picture means so much to me and reminds me of how blessed I am.

The guy in the back, his name is Pastor Tim Wallace. He served the Lord and meant a lot to many. He is no longer with us. He didn’t lose his battle to cancer, he won. His faith stayed true during his trials and now he’s being rewarded greatly, with no pain!

This horse, Pacer, was another blessing. She was all heart and no matter what I asked, she gave it her all. I didn’t get to ride her but a few years because of an injury from her race track years.

Then there is myself, who loves barrel racing. I was truly blessed as there was a barrel race every night of the week where I live. I had dreams and goals of my own. But it wasn’t what God had planned at that time.

I got in a wreck and almost 2 years later, I am just able to ride a very broke horse. Only God knows if I will ever compete again.

I know that everything works out in Gods timing, but I would love to be able to run down that alley again. I remember those days that I was frustrated when we tipped a barrel or wasn’t clocking. But now, I would love to be able to do that again.

Life changes, faster than what we would like. Our great horses, family, & friends, leave us sometimes without even a warning.

So don’t take anything for granted and enjoy your time on earth! If you love it find a way. If you don’t move on. Life is too short to be worrying and living in the what if’s! Live in the right now! If you can’t do something you love anymore, find the positive in every situation!

I needed to sell my Barrel Horse

So when I was told after my injection to slowly start riding again, I jumped at the chance. Although I knew in the back of my head this was not the right time.

At first I told myself it was because he was a push style and with my hip injury, I really needed a free runner. I also wanted a 1D horse so I can move up a division. So I kept thinking to sell him and slowly look for another one and by that time I would be ready.

It was one of the hardest decisions I have ever made. I’ve had other horses but I had a connection with him. I got the horse when he only had 30 days of riding. I would ride him in an arena and he would run to the gate. He didn’t know how to neck rein, he was pretty flexible though and willing. He never loped before so he would do a crow hop at first til he learned where to place his feet with someone on him. It was by no means an “I don’t want you on me” buck.

I originally bought him for my daughter but they never really clicked. She could ride him but you could tell they just were not meant for each other. So I just kept riding him.

I trained him to where I could shoot a bow off of him, neck rein, move off your leg, carry flags, he won money in the 3D and 4D barrel races. He ran 22-23 in poles when I actually only played around in poles and ran him a couple times. He was easy to catch and just an overall fun horse to ride. He always took care of me! He was one of those horses that were just a joy to ride.

I had other horses I have bought and sold over the years and had no problem. There were some really good ones too. But this one was special!

I was so torn but God gave me strength to do it. I prayed about it for awhile and finally I decided to let go and trust God. This was a decision I made over more than a couple months.

The lady that I sold him to, has an unbelievable story and she is an inspiration. Looking back I know God placed her in my life for a reason and truly grateful I turned down a couple other people. I think she was the right fit.

It made my heart happy that he brought her joy. But I was still lost! I thought I was meant to go buy a free runner so when I was ready to ride I would just be ready. I would find a couple horses but nothing panned out.

I even had told a lady I would take a horse, but wanted to wait til she cleared from the vet. They made her an appointment that week and then when I called the vet, the vet said they cancelled the appointment. I called that lady and she had sold her to someone else. I know God was saving me on that one.

So then I started thinking, that is when I realized why I needed to sell my barrel horse. I didn’t have to sell him. He would have been perfect sitting in the pasture til I was ready.

It wasn’t because I needed a faster horse, it was because God had a plan for me and for that horse. But I know God’s plan is so much greater than mine!

He knew any horse I had, it would have to sit in the pasture for awhile. At the time I still wasn’t thinking I was going to have surgery. I thought I was on the downhill part of that journey. God knew different!

See in our lives God watches over each one of us. He knows what we are going to go through before we do. He knew I would be tempted to ride before I was physically and mentally ready so he took away all of the horses that I could ride.

I sold my barrel horse because I needed time. I needed to learn patience and how to grow both physically and mentally. I had to grow stronger in not only my faith but my body. I needed to help my daughters and enjoy time with them. I needed to focus on the little things in life as a whole picture.

God has put me on a wonderful journey and I know now I didn’t have to sell my horse, but I needed to. I’m trusting Gods plan! When I am ready to ride again, God will put a horse that’s ready in my life.

So for now I am enjoying my colts, family, work, and life! Each struggle we go through ends up a blessing in disguise, if we just open our hearts!

Life as a barrel horse!

Imagine your life as a barrel race and not just any barrel race imagine your life as the horse in the race.

There are many kinds of horses, just like there are many kinds of people.

Horses range from very tall to really short, there is no perfect sized barrel horse!

Some of us fight the bit, we want to be in control, we don’t trust anybody to take over our life.

There are others that are more willing to trust. It doesn’t matter what kind of horse, or who we are, we are all set for the same goal in mind.

We have many trials we face that may turn us in different directions. We may stumble, we may throw a fit. In the end our main goal should be to get through those turns and make it home to the good Lord!

So remember, no matter what type of horse you are, let Jesus guide your reins. You may stumble because you take a wrong step, but he will help guide you through your journey of life!

Labral Tear Surgery

Hopefully this will help someone prepare for their journey. It is not an easy one.

Since I already had the crutches, we put them in the truck for afterwards. I was not able to eat or drink, so got up and took off my wedding rings and put them in a safe spot at the house. I figured it would be safer than the hospital, so only took what I wore that day.

I wore baggy clothes that I actually went out and bought before so it was easy to slip on after surgery. I made sure I took my glasses instead of wearing contacts. I forgot to pack pillows and blankets but I had a coat.

We had to be there at 8:30 in the morning and was took back to a room that was Private, which was nice. My husband was able to stay in that room and not have to wait in the waiting area.

After getting into the special gown I had to do that normal pee in a cup. They also put the IV in with one stick which was amazing in itself. They drew blood as well and went over medications and other things what to expect. The surgeon came in and marked my hip and told us a few exercises to do everyday and headed to get ready.

After that the nurse was rushing and everybody was getting me ready as the surgeon was ready to go.

After they got everything ready for me to go I gave my husband a kiss and then we headed out. The anesthesiologist was in the room and he gave me versed which his exact words were, “the I don’t care medicine”. Which I am familiar with and I did not make it even out of the room before I either went out or I just forgot.

Next thing I remember is being groggy and cold but they had a blower underneath the blankets to keep me warm and the nurse was right beside me. It was a post-op recovery room, which reminded me of an ER set up.

At one point my Dr came in to see me in the recovery room as I was having some problems with my blood pressure and oxygen. My oxygen level was low so I was put on 2 liters. I remember them bumping me up afterwards to 3 when the doctor was there to get my oxygen back up. My blood pressure was very low as well and they said it got up to 88 over 40 something when my doctor was there. I do remember at one point the nurse told me I could go back to the room when they get my vitals a little bit better.

The next thing I remember is waking up again and my husband was in the room as they had transferred me into the private room where he had been waiting.

Surgery lasted about 3 hours and recovery took a little bit longer than expected. The surgeon said he normally has to tap the anchors in place but he easily pushed mine in. He said I had some cartlidge damage, and was concerned regarding the softness of my bones. So instead of being 50% I was 25% weight bearing.

We stayed there for a little bit longer and everything was a little fuzzy so I’m not sure really what went on after that.

I do know that two of the nurses helped get me dressed while my husband went and got my truck. They first helped me to the bathroom and I do remember them saying that I actually was doing better than what they expected me to do as I walked with assistance to the bathroom. I used them as crutches.

When I got dressed they just slipped my sweatpants over my brace so if I needed to go to the bathroom I wouldn’t have to take off the brace for that day. They took me out in a wheelchair and it was a struggle to get my leg up as I couldn’t lift it.

I don’t remember any conversations on the way home. But it usually takes about an hour and a half to get home. When I got home I used the crutches and got in the house and laid on the couch.

My husband had to help me get on and off the couch because I could not lift that leg at all and I couldn’t get up without him picking me up. I had a pillow for my head and two pillows for my legs, an ice pack, and of course a blanket. I took the hydro-acet like instructed that night but didn’t take the Valium.

Pre labral tear surgery

So we made an appointment with the surgeon and set a date for November 13th, 2017. I informed my boss and everyone else.

During the next couple weeks there was a lot going through my head.

Whether I was making the correct decision, or was it going to be a mistake. What would happen if something went wrong and I couldn’t walk again, was on crutches or wheelchair for the rest of my life? Or ultimately, what if I didn’t make it out of surgery?

I kept these feelings to myself, as I didn’t want anyone to worry. So I did what I always do in those times, prayed.

I prayed a lot, for not only just the surgery itself, but everyone else. It helped calm me and I realized I would be fine. I knew I was supposed to have surgery or God would have healed it completely before. I tried for a year to get things to quit hurting so I wouldn’t have to. But I learned to trust God as his plans are greater than mine!

The week before the surgery my family and I deep cleaned the whole house, did all the laundry, went shopping for food, and spent some time together.

Which I recommend anyone who has this surgery, if you can, to deep clean your house and go shopping prior.

I will go over a shopping list recommended next time.

Life on crutches part one

The first part of the struggles with being on crutches was gaining strength. Trying to walk very far took a lot out of me. It was also a challenge getting up and down stairs, in and out of stores, and just doing regular tasks.

I was blessed having horses so my upper body strength wasn’t too bad, but some muscles you just don’t use.

In the beginning, I had someone carry everything for me, from food to laptop for work. It was December 1 when I was put on crutches so of course, I couldn’t help decorate for Christmas.

Having to sit around while other people took care of my animals, decorated for Christmas, and did things for me I was unable to do at the time, bothered me. I had a some pity parties, got frustrated, cried, and withdrew at times.

My hunting season was not great either as I didn’t get to hunt much. So not being able to help provide meat in the freezer was a downfall as well.

I wanted so much to just go about my life with no worries, but there I was limited. I started thinking of all the things I couldn’t do, and what I was missing out on. I just felt helpless.

I couldn’t jump on the trampoline, couldn’t walk my horse, couldn’t go to BBR

Finals although I qualified. I was upset because I had a chance to be top 10 in my horses division, but due to the wreck I had to stop riding horses until I was cleared. I started getting grumpy and withdrew.

Then of course my husband stepped in and he allowed me to have a breakdown, pity party, or whatever you want to call it. I cried and afterwards I felt so much better. I then turned to God for answers and realized that although my current situation was tough, it was not who I was, I am no quitter.

I am really good at talking with God when things are going good, but I have struggled with getting closer to him when I struggle.

I started thinking of all the positives, and found a way to carry my computer for work. I didn’t give up and got my horse to lead him with my crutches. I figured out solutions to a my problems that I could address.

I had my kids take turns going to the store with me so I could shop instead of my husband, unless it required heavy lifting.

I spent time with my horse just brushing him while on crutches. My barrel horse was in the barn, so I had to have someone catch him and turn him loose in the pasture for a little bit then put him back up. I tried leading him with the crutches but I would hit his leg and it wouldn’t work out. I never gave up though and kept trying! One day we both figured out how to manage with me on crutches. That was a “winning” situation, and I felt so independent and happy!

I wrote in a journal to release some frustrations and challenges.

I learned how to carry plates, and drinks with my crutches and managed to get in and out of the shower by myself.

Now it was hard when I got my letter for BBR finals and had to just throw it away. But I prayed about it and came to the conclusion there was a reason for me not going.

Well during the BBR they had a bad storm and they didn’t get to perform all days and some trailers were tipped over. So God protected me from that.

God has showed me different things along the way. I read the whole bible front to back then started picking it apart to really understand it. This helped me out and the books of Job and Esther stuck out to me.

Esther was born to do something great, although she was scared and didn’ know how.

Job had so much faith, even after loosing everything. He never gave up!

They both were rewarded for the love they shared for God and doing what was right, even when it was hard.

I missed out a lot with my girls, husband, and horses. But I did grow. I grew spiritually and physically.

Through physical therapy I gained strength and different excercises to keep my strength and get stronger than before.

Spiritually I grew closer to God, and opened my eyes. I learned patience, perseverance, hope, and faith the hard way. I learned that no matter what God is close to the broken hearted and he does provide. Although I already knew it, he reinforced it.

I made it through, and after months of being non weight bearing my fracture started to heal.

I was able to get off crutches and had an injection in my hip. The doctor wanted me to continue excercising and gaining strength so when or if I need surgery, I will be strong enough. He said recovery would be easier that way. It was kind of a relief I would be off crutches for summer.

Wreck that changed everything

I was driving my Chevy one ton truck as the sun was coming up when my life changed. My radio was tuned to K-Love, which is a Christian station. I had just got promoted at work about two weeks prior, and was headed to work.

I popped up over a small hill and seen a person at a stop sign, but before I had a chance to do anything she pulled out in front of me.

She was a young girl headed to school & I knew in an instant we would collide. I tried to slow down but it happened in a split second, although it seemed to last forever.

I remember praying to God to protect her as she was in a smaller vehicle. The impact was in her drivers side and luckily it hit her front wheel, and drivers door. It pushed her over 50 Yards.

If it would have hit only her drivers door, things would have been different. She was also lucky that her car was older and made of metal instead of fiberglass.

When the collision was over, I expected the worst. I couldn’t see the girl and couldn’t open my door, or unbuckle. There was the stench of airbags and antifreeze. My first thought was get to her, so I managed to finally unbuckle by God’s grace. The buckles locked so It took awhile to figure a way out of it. Then I forcefully opened my door as it was dented. About that time I seen her opening the passenger side of her car. She had to crawl over her console to get out.

I walked over to her and checked her for injuries, then gave her a hug. Poor thing was shaking and it appeared she was fine with the exception of a few minor cuts and scratches from her broken glass.

I called 911 & opted no ambulance since I was not in extreme pain. With being out in the country it took awhile before help arrived.

There was a guy that asked if I could move my truck so got my truck moved out of the middle of the road. Right afterwards the guy left the scene although he was the first one there.

I realized I would not be moving my truck anymore. I also called my husband who made it there in no time and just by the grace of God he was in service. He was working construction at the time and where they were building it is hit & miss.

As we were waiting my neck, groin, and back started hurting. I figured it was whiplash and didn’t think anything of it. I have high pain tolerance so I figured I would have my husband take me to get checked.

By the time the tow truck got my truck to my house, and I got to the hospital, a few hours had passed. I was swollen & my groin hurt. I’ve never had that kind of pain there before. They did an X-ray for mainly my back, they said I probably pulled a groin muscle. They found a mass as well that they were concerned with.

They offered pain medication and told me to follow up with my primary.